Friday, March 9, 2012

Azeri Eurovision Song Contest - Potential Disaster?

As I write this blog we have approximately eight weeks to go until the final of that most annoying annual event, the Eurovision Song Contest, bursts onto our television screens. But I guess only about 8% of the peoples of Europe will actually nestle down in from of the box and undergo this two hours of hopeless, self-indulging, musical kitsch. This gross indulgence can be characterised as an embarassing venture to somehow bring the disparate nations of Europe into some kind of cosy, cosmopolitan harmony. Irrespective of that, Baku is stampeding ahead getting the city into shape for the cauldrons of visitors expected to descend on the city in May.

As I look around the city and read and listen to what I can about the extensive planning that is going on, I do wonder if the Azeris have bitten off more than they can chew. Depending on what you read and who you listen to, the Azeri authorities are expecting anything between 30,000 and 50,000 visitors to the city. Oh really? Okay, let’s take an average of 40,000 visitors for the week’s event. Who and where are these people going to live? For instance just who are these 40,000 souls: music lovers, tourists, friends of contestants - just who? But more importantly can they afford to come here in the first place? I read recently that the capacity of all Baku hotels on a daily basis is circa 12,000 - 13,000 which, if my arithmetic doesn’t fail me, leaves us with a shortfall of about 28,000 - 27,000 rooms! Potential disaster?

To continue with the accommodation question, what visitors are probably blissfully unaware of is the steep costs of hotel rooms in Baku. For some insane reason the authorities continue to allow, even promote, the construction of obnoxiously expensive hotels. For instance, just last October (2011) the Hilton opened in Baku to much fanfare together with the presence of President Aliyev himself. Well, if you’re coming to Baku for the song contest and you want to stay at the Hilton, the cheapest room (single) will set you back £170/night. And remember that is during a normal month. Will they increase the cost of a room during Eurovision week? Uh-huh! Oh! I hear you exclaim. And then I read the other day that:

“Securing a hotel place in our opinion would be the most serious challenge for song contest fans. So, early bookings are highly recommended. On the other hand, all bookings for Baku hotels are not possible at the moment, since the Ministry of Tourism of Azerbaijan recommended all Baku hotels to place a total block on Eurovision 2012 week in Baku. It’s not clear what their idea is: to make some sort of centralised booking system or something else. But with the result no bookings are possible, then hotels themselves do not know when and in what direction the situation will change.”

One statistic that stood out for me like a sore thumb was the declaration that Baku was the second most expensive ex-CIS city to live in after Moscow, which was the most expensive. This was the result of a 40-city analysis of spending/costing trends in countries stretching from Estonia to Azerbaijan. Prices in Baku are high enough as it stands and Goodness only knows what it will be like during Eurovision week. I suppose I should just add just how would the local Azeris cope with an influx of 40,000 visitors in one week!

I will finish with the issue of visas. Or, probably in many cases in weeks to come, the non-issue of visas. At the beginning of last month the Culture and Tourism Ministry declared proudly that the much heralded electronic visa system would be in place for Eurovision. This would have been a blessing in disguise, it’s just that, a couple of weeks later, the same Government department declared that the electronic visa system would not be available until July of this year. This simply means that in order to attend the Eurovision Song Contest in Baku in May, you will require to have your visa processed and issued in your country of origin before even thinking about booking your flights. As the blog title states: a Potential Disaster.

I will end by adding my own personal summing up of this travelling circus, and if you are still not convinced that the ESC is for plonkers, imbeciles and stooges, take a look at Russia’s entrant for this years farce:

http://www.rferl.org/content/russian_grannies_got_to_eurovision/24509521.html

I REST MY CASE!